Originally Posted by KRJ Interactive
geared towards individuals and small businesses owners who do not have a lot of business know how.
Then "hit that button" with your headline (because right now it's missing it completely)...maybe something along the lines of...we turn business dreams into money...no matter how crazy, we will turn your business idea into a money-making machine - even if you're absolutely clueless about what you need to do"
maybe use a title and a subtitle...brainstorm, write 100 different headings/subheadings and then pick the one that does the best job of explaining what you do (in as few words as possible)
and the desription? I'd say you need to start explaining how you plan to help me - it needs to convince you can get my idea in front of the eyes of some rich investor, or that you can connect me with the right business partner, whatever you say, you better start convincing me you're pretty damn good at your job (because from your current description, I don't feel that)
and that's only the beginning...